Now that Russia is pulling out of the International Space Station, maybe Sweden could pitch in and help?
Archive for ‘Comics’
Dear God I hope nobody has done this joke before but it’s the internet so it’s probably already been done forty eight billion times and everyone is going to sue me for all my internet money so please just let me know where I should send you my three dollars thanks.
Alright, here’s my Terry’s Big Adventure story.
As I’ve told you before, I used to get a big batch of new Commodore 64 games every fortnight from the local computer club. I would scour the magazines for reviews of all the greatest games around, and make sure that I had enough blank floppies to get ‘evaluation’ copies. For one reason or another, I had a couple of spare blanks at the end of one of those club meetings, so was just grabbing random games and figured something might be interesting.
One of those games was Terry’s Big Adventure, a cute and colourful take on the Super Mario Bros. formula that replaced jumping on goombas with attacking them with yo-yos. It was a very pleasant game, with cheerful music and bright backdrops to accompany you on your journey through the various worlds. I liked how you got knocked back a bit when you hit an enemy, that was a cool touch and stopped you from just rampaging through each stage.
Anyway, for some reason my sister really got into Terry’s Big Adventure. She liked Great Giana Sisters a lot a year or two prior, and this was outwardly similar, so it made sense in retrospect but man she ticked me off. Every single day after school she would race me home in order to get to the Commodore 64 first and then just play Terry’s for like three hours while I waited for her to get off and play some real game like…oh I dunno, probably Elite again.
After weeks of this I had had enough of her hogging my Commodore 64, and I did what any sensible person would do: I formatted the Terry’s Big Adventure disk.
She didn’t speak to me for years after that.
I was not a good person, now that I think of it.
I think it’s time that we, as a gaming community, finally get together and come to terms with one of the industry’s deepest shames: Klax wasn’t as good a game as we say it was.
I know reading that hurts. You’re probably angry at me right now. “NO!” you might be screaming, “KLAX WAS A ’90s PUZZLE GAME MASTERPIECE!” and to be honest I understand. We’ve all been there. We’ve all fired up Klax at one point or another, determined to have fun at this overly complex puzzle game. Some of us found the courage to admit that it wasn’t as addictive as everyone else was saying it was, is all. Some of us owned Lynxes and couldn’t play Tetris. I get it.
But now the ’90s are over, and there is no longer time for Klax, and we can move on with our lives with new hope.
SNK made some incredible fighting games. Of course you have the legendary Samurai Shodown games, and you can’t deny the place King of Fighters has in fighting game history. It did some interesting things especially with the team format and it used the whole “characters from other games” schtick well before Capcom ran with it in the Versus series. Heck, I even liked Art of Fighting, and hardly anyone liked Art of Fighting!
Oh man, how good were those Neo Geo Pocket Colour fighting games, they were bloody tops they were.
I liked Pool of Radiance a lot, but I have to give my preference to Bard’s Tale in the long run. The game’s plot never really made me understand what the problem was – the city the characters started in seemed like it was doing just fine, so why not just, y’know, chill out at home or whatever?
(WARNING: The events and situations depicted in this comic did not actually occur in the video game “Dr. Robotnik’s Mean Bean Machine”! This is a work of fiction!)
Man, did I love Dr. Robotnik’s Mean Bean Machine or what. It was my first exposure to Puyo Puyo, even though I had long-heard about how awesome it was in Japan, and (I think) this was the first western release of the game, so of course I absolutely devoured it upon release. It was an addictive puzzle game in single player, but when you had two equally-matched human players fighting it out, sending waves and waves of junk blocks back and forth between each other…I really can’t think of many games that come close to how fun and instantly addictive as this was.
And it still holds up! I recently started playing it again as part of the Sega MegaDrive Collection on PlayStation 3, and found myself surprised at how much fun it was. It’s quite a soothing experience when you’re in the zone. For some reason I’ve developed a habit of intentionally filling the playfield with random blocks and then trying to clear it all out at the last minute, and the cartoon characters are great to watch. Give it a try, it’s on practically every platform ever!
The first thing I do after surviving a plane crash is grab my gun and kill everyone who comes running towards me, it’s a natural response really.
Ikari Warriors! I really enjoyed this in the arcade for the couple of times I was fortunate enough to find a cabinet, but the unique control system made it a bit of a rarity. It had a conventional eight-way joystick to control movement, but the joystick also rotated so you can change the direction the player faced. Kind of like what if Smash TV‘s perfect twin-joystick controls got smooshed into one sorta-working joystick deal.
The home conversions worked better, especially because once you paid for the game (you did pay for your copy right…definitely no eagle holding a floppy disc graphic appearing when you first load the game here, no sir, cough) you could play lots of times and get better at it and get further into it each try. And it was a great laugh in two player mode as you steal the tank your mate was going after only to get it blown up a few seconds later.
But ugh that music. That 17 second-long music, that just looped forever, NO THANK YOU SIR.
I liked Resident Evil more back when it was called Alone In The Dark oh wait I’ve already done that joke.
Anyhoi! I can’t say I was ever a huge fan of the Resident Evil series, horror really isn’t my cup of tea (seriously, anything darker than an episode of The Muppet Show leaves me a bit icky) and I just wanted to play wip’Eout” instead when I was on my PlayStation.
Still, I do remember thinking that the gimmick where the game showed the doors opening REALLY REALLY SLOWLY in order to mask the game loading the next room was pretty damn cheap even then.
Oh! I recorded me drawing this comic from scratch, and it didn’t take long at all but it looks super quick now that I’ve sped up the video like 16 times. Enjoy!
Super Puzzle Fighter 2 Turbo is a fantastic puzzle game that doesn’t even need the Street Fighter characters to be in my must-play list. There’s a great to-and-fro between evenly matched players as they send ever-growing waves of junk blocks back and forth between each other.
But geez it was always kind of weird that the characters just kind of mimed fighting at each other while blocks kept falling. Or maybe it was just me?